Photo: Kristina Tripkovic

November 19

"I WAS SLIPPING FAST"

We A.A.'s are active folk, enjoying the satisfactions of dealing with the realities of life, . . . So it isn't surprising that we often tend to slight serious meditation and prayer as something not really necessary.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 96

I had been slipping away from the program for some time, but it took a death threat from a terminal disease to bring me back, and particularly to the practice of the Eleventh Step of our blessed Fellowship. Although I had fifteen years of sobriety and was still very active in the program, I knew that the quality of my sobriety had slipped badly. Eighteen months later, a checkup revealed a malignant tumor and a prognosis of certain death within six months. Despair settled in when I enrolled in a rehab program, after which I suffered two small strokes which revealed two large brain tumors. As I kept hitting new bottoms I had to ask myself why this was happening to me. God allowed me to recognize my dishonesty and to become teachable again. Miracles began to happen. But primarily I relearned the whole meaning of the Eleventh Step. My physical condition has improved dramatically, but my illness is minor compared to what I almost lost completely.

From the book Daily Reflections | Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.